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maanantai, syyskuu 30, 2002
"Koitan silti olla viilee tied�n miss� vaara piilee..."
I really should relax. All I think about is that musical. Songs. My part of it. Im on the stage all the time. I have hardest part as singer :P and then yesterday we had first dance rehersals...and I felt that I had huge stealpipe or something in my arse, or something like that, I just couldnt move...anyway, we did one dance to 'radio choir' (which is this three girls, called as 'tiput') solo song. to sing and dance and trying to look cool and sexy - that's extremely hard. I hope I'll manage it well. Im really, really worried and I have no power to think that 'fer fuck sakes, Im so pro that...' ;) Oh gosh.
maanantai, syyskuu 30, 2002 |
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lauantai, syyskuu 28, 2002
So R&A is over at my part. 5 days I sat in movie theater. Ass is quite sore, neck is hurting, but goddamn, it was So much worth it. I can tell. Gaah, Im so lazy that I dont really want to check which movies I've hyped at here, but even so (I check it quickly and add here movies which I havent talked about...) ...
Monday we went see japanise movie Princess Blade (aka Shurayuki-Hime) which was extremely entertaining action fare. Right from the start I was thinking that goddamn this looks great. Visually it was hothot and gaah...if you wait anything clever and something deeply philosophic go to read Platon, this movie is just for fun. I loved it.
Then first and the only movie from South Korea I had change to check out. Bad Guy (aka Nabbeun namja). It was a bit bizarre for start, but when I went in to quite realistic world of that movie, I was moved to tears. �gain now I wont spoil you, but hehe funny was that in the end of movie there was quite suprising soundtrack - Carolas swedish gospel music (In finland that song is called 'P�iv� vain ja hetki kerrallansa')...In korean movie! Haha. Well, I loved that movie.
Then (woo!) Battle Royal! It was movie I could have hated or just loved. So Im glad I just loved it. From the start it was very haunting, but when you got inside it movie turned into great entertaiment. I just could die for good black humor, and this movie, I promise, have it a lot. Takeshi Kitano was funny in his role as teacher Kitano and well...you'll see. After movie one funny thing happend. Outside Bio Rex was a young man with tv-camera. He asked me that could I asnwer in few questions about the movie. Then girl arrived with a notes and camera pointed at my face. They didnt ask my name or anything. "Did you like this movie? What kind of ppl you would recomend this?" I answered that I liked it yadiyaa and it would be ok for over 16years old ppl. Or something. I dont really remember.
Then she asked (I almost busted to laugh): "Did you wait for seeing a lot of violence and did you get what you where waiting for?" D-uh?! I almost let myself go but I said something not so great (my first line which came in to my mind) like "Oh yeah There was Soooo much blood that I totally sweat my pants cause it was soo bloody hot!" but I luckily kept my mind at control and didnt make a fool of myself. It was close, thought. Then the best question ever! "Tell me something about the style of the director of this film - Takeshi kitano." WHAT?! I stared the girl with question paper. I hate myself cause right then I forgot name of real director (Kinji Fukasaku) and didnt say what I was saying "The director isnt Kitano, he's just acting, go and study before you start to make a fool of yourself, assholes!" But cause I didnt remember Fukasaku's name at then, I just said something little like "Yes I like his works" and then the girl thanked me and I walked away - fast as lightning. Funny, they didnt even tell me who they where, what for they where soothing me and so on. Very un-professional. :P Duh.
Then some Takashi Miike (yee!)...Agitator (aka Araburu tamashii-tachi). Very nice and cool yaguza movie. Ichi the Killer !! It was!! Great. Sick, fun, black humor, splatter...Well, It was cool visually and everything. Liked a lot. and Avalon...japanese movie with polish actors and filmed/acted/etc in polish. Wow! Audivisually most amazing movie. Boring, if you waited for action flik. I loved it. Music by Kenji Kawai (Ghost in the Shell is his work and also he did music for Princess Blade)...It was amazing. It was jewel. It took my heart. Drool...
So...there they where. Now sitting here wearing cool R&A t-shirt and feeling that all the movies I saw where from different genre. Many movies I missed like dark water and so on. But some day I'll see 'em too. You just cannot get everything.
Today is a busy day. I have to be at the city 15.00 at My way, first gig. Then to my uncles place and there to my way again at 22.00 gig starts. Free booze and so on. Nicey. Then home at morning. tomorrow 15->night dance and music (for musical) rehersals. Which means - I cannot drink a lot today, good. :) Gaah, Im in hurry already and I've been sitting here hours and hours. Shame on me. Gotta run then. I dont have no idea what to wear or what so ever, so off I go.
[11:39] 'Voisitteko kertoa lyhyesti Ohjaaja Takeshi Kitanon tyylist�'
[11:39] !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[11:39] T����
[11:39] katoin hetken et say what
[11:39] eih�n takeshi kitano sit� oo ees
lauantai, syyskuu 28, 2002 |
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I have powerful friends. Watch out.
lauantai, syyskuu 28, 2002 |
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perjantai, syyskuu 27, 2002
Back home! Now hurry hurry and to city!
my FridayFive...
1. What are your favorite ways to relax and unwind?
Sleep. Listen music and sing along. Spend time in silence or observing space.
2. What do you do the moment you get home from work/school/errands?
Change my clothes, put some coffee or tea on and turn computer on.
3. What are your favorite aromatherapeutic smells?
Jasmine.
4. Do you feel more relaxed with a group of friends or hanging out by yourself?
Well it quit depends on situation. Im quite hermit, but I truly enjoy time I spend with my friends. There are times when I start total phone/etc silence and just enjoy my own company.
5. What is something that you feel is relaxing but most people don't?
Screaming to wind! Or then when Im bored and tired and for example sitting in bus or train I start to make fool of myself - singing musical numbers and so on ;) and going on stage, first I am shaky as hell, almost losing my mind but on the stage - Im relaxed. Like meditading...
Oki! Now I have to hurry!
perjantai, syyskuu 27, 2002 |
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R&A is now done for me. Last movies I watched tonight. Great it was. I speak like Yoda. Yes...mm. Tomorrow back to Tku. At morning. For fuck sakes...Anyway, busy weekend and week coming along. Tomorrow some rehersals, saturday some rehersals and Saga gig (woo) and sunday musical rehersals all day long. Yay? Oh well - Avalon kicked ass, Wooo! If you ever have a change to see it, go go!
perjantai, syyskuu 27, 2002 |
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keskiviikko, syyskuu 25, 2002
Hum. Good Morning. I just woke up. Slept something like...erm...12h or something. Feeling a bit dizzy.
Yesterday at R&A was great. Extremely interesting. First this Spanish movie Fausto 5.0 (go official site). I loved it. It is something I cannot really describe. It was just plain fun. Then indian musical which lasted almost 4 hours! Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham (english title "Sometimes happiness, sometimes sorrow" or nick name K3G)...Now Im addicted! I remember how my face was achy when we walked out from theater, but I couldnt help myself, movie was something you dont see every day (well you could if you live in india). Colorful, joyful, full of music and dance, laughter and crying (which was quite stupid from time to time, so goddamn dramatic! :)) and of course love!...It was so Kitch! It was sold out and every people which was in there have so much fun. Now Im listening music from movie. I had to search it, Im addicted. Yeah...mmm...tired.
Anyway, when you meet me, do not wonder if I suddenly start to sing hindish and dance, m'kay? ;)
Nothing much have happend on the world. Autumn. Oh yeah I met Jori yesterday, it was nice. We really should meet more. Shame on me.
keskiviikko, syyskuu 25, 2002 |
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tiistai, syyskuu 24, 2002
GAAH! Another damn jolly stupid flash animation...
tiistai, syyskuu 24, 2002 |
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sunnuntai, syyskuu 22, 2002
Why in fucking earth he is calling to my friends, sending sick sms to me, etc...IM going out of my mind. What ever.
sunnuntai, syyskuu 22, 2002 |
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IM IN LOVE!!
sunnuntai, syyskuu 22, 2002 |
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Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi aka Spirited away was great. the most beautiful movie/cartoon I've ever seen. really. There where times when I was sitting on my place, silently crying and just stared the widescreen totally amazed by the things I saw. After I came out from theather I was floating high ;) Happy, Sappy. If you want something to fill our little caves in your imaginations, go and see it.
sunnuntai, syyskuu 22, 2002 |
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Listening OP:L bastards and feeling well...what could I say. What a fucking sappy happy joyjoy day, then I got myself a bit drunk with friends and we have jolly time. After it - Im going down down down. Down. Cheer me up and sing my gbook. Yeah!
sunnuntai, syyskuu 22, 2002 |
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lauantai, syyskuu 21, 2002
Fucking hell. I must tell you something about the movies I saw last night. Kiyoshi Kurosawa's Pulse (/Kairo) da horrormovie was something terrifying! Gosh! It was so great that I had to stare it and I was so scared that I couldnt close my eyes. In everyway it was fab. Best horror film I've ever seen. I was so scared that I just stared the screen and my tears run out from my eyes. My heart beated but I just had to watch it. Whole theater was full of tension. Even all the huge tought guys where eating their fists and scared as hell. 8) It was fab, Im not going to tell anything about it, cause I dont want to spoil it, but go and see it if you ever have a change. I sure you, Its great! Too great (if you have wild imagination).
. Another was Hotel by Mike Figgis. I cannot really tell anything about it, cause it was absolutely weird, great, from ass and total masterpiece at my point of view. Great digital camera work, some great scenes, humor, soundtrack...acting. Impro was great! Wow. It had no idea, but it was great still. Yay. Now - Coffee, shower and hurry hurry!
lauantai, syyskuu 21, 2002 |
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perjantai, syyskuu 20, 2002
Its autumn. Cold. Hell.
perjantai, syyskuu 20, 2002 |
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Past few days have been hell on earth. Well maybe I take all too seriously or something, but still...Gaah. Yesterday I woke up. Then everything started to go hell right after I got myself up from bed. Why did I ever leave my comfy bed after all, I dont know, but I had hectic and busy day. Wednesday was just cloudy gloomy day, sat in the bar, did really nothing. Ok back to yesterday...I woke up and started to call around, cause Finnish system sucks I had one day 'til I had to leave my school aplications. The thing is that there is no school where I really want in. I didnt want to try to get in any. But you must go and fill those bloody aplications, cause otherwise I will lose all my social securing and so on...I was so pissed off after I sat on the phone few hours listening this elevator music and waited answer for my question. Then I started to practise cello. I took bow from bag and started to play. It was broken. Then I screamed to wind and started to get ready and hit the road to town. I runned carrying 9kg cello backage on my back and I saw that my bus was driving towards the bus stop way too early. I ran. Even tho driver saw me, he slowed a bit, but then possibly thought that I wont make it in sec and leaved me there. Next bus went after 20mins. I was already late. Another high scream to wind. Then Korte called me, and promised to pick me up from my lesson and drive me to apteekki to get some coffee and relax. After few tobacco and cursing next bus came and I was on my way to city. Then I ran again (city was full of ppl and no one ever gives road to little petite woman who is carrying cello bag which is as big as she is) to pick next bus to music school and finally I was there. But lesson was great!! I got a change to play with Irma's bow, which is old, expensive and perfect. I've never got my cello to sound like that. Then I decided that what ever it takes, Im going to get new bow. and package. My back is killing me. Then day went ok, shitchat with Korte. A lot of laugh. Before 6pm I was home again, started to look for job from internet and so on. Today I went to 'Ty�kk�ri' and filled school aplications to schools which I will never ever get into, I hope. Then I jumped in the bus and now, Im at Helsinki. In an hour first Love and Anarchy movie starts.Yay! When you go down, you just can come up!
perjantai, syyskuu 20, 2002 |
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torstai, syyskuu 19, 2002
After long while, I start to practise cello, cause I have lesson today. I take cello out from bag and then bow. It looked ok, but when I started to play. Crash. Broken. "Noooooo!!!1" Its not just my day, so it seems. Fucking hell. AARRGH!
torstai, syyskuu 19, 2002 |
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keskiviikko, syyskuu 18, 2002
Im a child in a toystore. I've been reading lomography pages all over hundred times and again drooling cameras which I'll never have change to lay my hands to. My hands get sweaty and I play with all these ideas of pictures...same thing with digicamera...SIGH. Wish there would be a God who could drop me a camera from the sky. I wish I have a place to deliver my films by myself, cause I never have enought money to go to fotoshops etc. I have a bunch of films in fridge, oldest are back from 2-3years...expensive films which takes fortune to get on paper. Gaah. I have a huge huge breataking passion for photography, but I've burried it deeply inside me, cause it takes a lot of money. I was so on my way to be photographer years ago, and now I hardly ever touch camera. After Senni decided that its her thingie, I somehow drawn myself away and let her do the thingie. She's funny sometimes cause its important to her to keep it as 'ITS MY THING'-thing, you know :) Aaanyway.
I've been so close of total collapse and physical pass out like past few or three days that I start to get worried. I feel shaky and weak. What ever I eat, I dont get physical powers back. Im like having hung over, which I dont have. If I sleep forever, I dont feel any better when I wake up, Im sleepy all the time. And when I move, I almost fall down, cause world is spinning and so on. I've totally lost my sense of balance. From time to time. Gosh...
Ok Now some tea. Im so tired.
keskiviikko, syyskuu 18, 2002 |
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tiistai, syyskuu 17, 2002
I woke up from nap 17.30 soemthing. Then phone started to rang. Korte asked me have I ate anything yet today. I said no. "Ok then, what kind of pizza you'll like?", I said that something with mushrooms. He said he'll be here in half an hour. Coolest. Then I had quick shower and so on. Now Im just waiting. He rocks. I dont know did we have some talk few days ago about beer in apteekki or any other plans, but this pizza sounds superb. Serafina called me too and want to meet me later at night. I said that call me. What a hectic social burst. That's good cause as humanbeing, im feeling shitty. I need some ppl around me at the moment. Even tho even then Im alone, but alone in company and shitchat and heavy laugh never hurts.
tiistai, syyskuu 17, 2002 |
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Long night it was. Went to sleep 6.30am. Woke up 20mins ago. I feel tired and slow. Coffee. Im helpless as a kitten up at tree. I think I'll hang around with Korte tonight. So we planned. Im doomed.
tiistai, syyskuu 17, 2002 |
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Oh god. I just love to come home from lonely bar night and end up to read my gbook. 8) Some unknown person have been at my site at afternoon and saved my day with this oh so jolly message:"FUCK YOU!!!!!UGLY BITCH... BURN IN HELL!" and that silly schmuck didnt even dare to tell real name...Sigh. Booring. I wish someday someone who have some antipations against me really say it out loud and dont hide under nick name "m*fucker"...
tiistai, syyskuu 17, 2002 |
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maanantai, syyskuu 16, 2002
Im like the best person in the world to fuck up things in life. But hey...;) Last night rehersals went extremely well, I can hardly wait to see how musical will turn out to be...oh well.
maanantai, syyskuu 16, 2002 |
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sunnuntai, syyskuu 15, 2002
cold.
sunnuntai, syyskuu 15, 2002 |
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lauantai, syyskuu 14, 2002
Oh shit. Good morning. What a day so far, I almost forgot how to make coffee and then destroyed one blog entry and now Im writing new one. Grrr. Still tired woke up awhile ago.
which song do you wish was written about you?
Stevie Ray Vaughan - Pride 'n Joy
Bj�rk - Play Dead
Joni Mitchell - Woodstock
which book character would you like to have been?
Lizard in Banana Yoshimoto's short storie...
what is the most played cd in your whole collection?
Groove Convention - Butter
what's your favourite day of the week and why?
any day i'm free of obligations.
what is your shortest relationship?
mmm probably 90% of the ones i've been in. eh?
how many dead people have you seen?
one.
what is your favourite finger and why?
dunno. the finger maybe...so useful.
quote me something from memory...
"Ironisia henkil�it� ei kannata piest�."
(Tuu-tikki - Tove Janson)
define 'love' without using a dictionary...
r-e-s-p-e-c-t.
the last thing you said to one of your parents was?
Call me when you wake up.
when was the last time you threw up?
Last week.
please please tell me now, is there something i should know?
life is a piece of chrystal.
guess how old you'll live to...
40-45.
and on your gravestone it will say?
I wont have any.
what is your greatest fear?
I dont fear anything anymore.
Who is your worst enemy?
Everyone who hurts ppl I care about.
what colour are your socks today?
Red/Pink/Grey striped woolsocks...
fact or fiction?
both, mixed.
found it, found it and lost it, or still looking for it?
still looking for it?
the person i most want to hug is?
Nobody.
lauantai, syyskuu 14, 2002 |
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Like, Im slow or something...I just realised that today I mean yesterday was 13th friday. And nothing bad seemed to happen...well, atleast not anything unfamiliar...
lauantai, syyskuu 14, 2002 |
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All my life is about trying to get ppl trust me, getting myself to trust to someone and for myself and everything that goes around me.
Ooh what a night, and oh what a bloody day. Anyway, 11 tickets for Love & Anarchy film fest are waiting for me. Should I scream and die? Gosh happy, it takes like week in Helsinki, but who cares a fuck! Im eating my fist cause Im so eager to get to sit down and stare the wide screen...
lauantai, syyskuu 14, 2002 |
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perjantai, syyskuu 13, 2002
LOL!
i am an indie snob!
How indie are you? test by ridethefader
You're just too cool for school, aren't you? You're pretty narrow minded
and opinionated with regards to music (and probably most other things
as well). But you're allowed to be, because you really are better
than everyone else. You take pride in obscurity.
You probably prefer vinyl too, you elitist bitch.
perjantai, syyskuu 13, 2002 |
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torstai, syyskuu 12, 2002
[23:50] < jdin_ > mulla on holdthebuttonissa nyt reilu 20 minsaa :)
[23:51] < jdin_ > ja kummatkin k�det n�ppiksell�, teippi pit�� kiinni hiirennapista :)
Having chokolate, green tea and bread. Nice night. Its cold and Im feeling tired. Soon to sleep. Tummy ache. Im floating out from my body and I need rest.
torstai, syyskuu 12, 2002 |
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Now I have a ticket to Alice Cooper concert in November. Yeah!
torstai, syyskuu 12, 2002 |
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sunnuntai, syyskuu 08, 2002
CMX gig was nicey. Night was success in many ways. Before gig we hanged around at Antero's place and had nice time. Then we got a phonecall from Lavis, who said that there are northen lights on the sky! So up we went, middle of the Helsinki city, to the rooftop where you could see everywhere! It was fantastic! Like in movie "Mary Poppin's"! Aurora's where beautiful, bottle of two dogs, standing there, watching light of lighthouse (which is far away, I usually go to stare the light of that thing when Im at Kaivopuisto)...Singing songs and screaming to the wind. Rooftops are totally another world. The best part of big cities, I think. Well after it we hurried to city, met Lavis (who was extremely drunk!) at Nosturi and went in wait for show! We got perfect place, A.W was right next to me, and I got a lot of room to dance and party! :) After show I was all sweaty and thirsty. We hurried to ctrl (Dunno why, I fucking hate that place, but it was Mikko's idea, so there we went...) and I drank cider, one j��karhu and dry martini. I forgot to say, that when CMX gig was over, we got out from Nosturi the world seemed to be gone. It was so foggy! You could hardly see 1m ahead. Ghostcity! Beautiful! :)) ...Aaanyway, I woke up like an hour ago, must say Im tired. Went to sleep very late, but oh god I was tired! Yesterday was so much full of action, and you know what! I got myself pierced! Sick bastard, I know, but what can you do...
I just heard that we have no musical rehersals today. My plan b) is that I go to Turku, meet Korte (maybe watch his show, dunno. Prolly, not.) and get few beers and jolly shitchat. We havent got time or change to meet/talk/etc in LONG long long long time. I indeed miss him and his stupid I mean great sense of humor.
I saw strange dreams last night...mostly about photographing, black and white pictures, digital cameras (olympus c4040zoom!!!11)...also one dream about me at Nosturi (ON the stage...heheh) ;)
Sun is shining. My friends life are in mess. I wonder will they ever find the golden mean. Im sick of worrying. But that's how it goes...
Im extremely tired. A lot to do back home, trying to avoid the fact that I have busy days ahead. Trying to avoid the fact that I have to visit Lieto someday in next week. Nicey :P Gaah, Laters then.
sunnuntai, syyskuu 08, 2002 |
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lauantai, syyskuu 07, 2002
AAAHAHAH!
If you want to read about indian pop singer, go here, heheheheh.... ;))
lauantai, syyskuu 07, 2002 |
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Mm. Few bottles of two dogs, one bottle of kriek cherry beer and huge bottle of juicy cherry wine. Mm. Waiting CMX gig and having time of my life. Tomorrow back to Turku to first Muste rehersals. I can hardly wait for that either. :) Laters. Partipartipeipe!
lauantai, syyskuu 07, 2002 |
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perjantai, syyskuu 06, 2002
I wonder...yesterday I drank some wine, and didnt even got drunk or anything - and now when I woke up, I have a little hungover. Gosh.
Yeah right on, tomorrow CMX at Nosturi! I can hardly wait. Tired I am, these past three weeks have been extremely hard for me, mentally. Im totally used up. Fighting with close person always push me down. And my life have been so hectic and in past 6months have been quite hard. But I'll survive. Now Im not having a lot of powers, but I gather more and tomorrow will be a new day.
I should cook something.
damn Malla, you should have wait one more day, we would have seen then. God, how I miss you. God, how I cry (well, almost ;)) cause we didnt got a change to meet. In Xmas then, I suppose. Graaah!
I need my friends now. I need them so much.
perjantai, syyskuu 06, 2002 |
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torstai, syyskuu 05, 2002
I am: feeling empty. tired. sleepy.
I think: nothing.
I know: how make fine tea.
I want: peace and powers.
I have: gotten mashed down.
I wish: seeing my friends wasn't so hard.
I hate: when i have to reapeat myself.
I miss: bossa and warm coffee.
I fear: getting nowhere.
I hear: Sting - Sister moon.
I search: time to relax and get rest.
I wonder: do i have anything to eat.
I regret: not playing enough cello.
I love: positive energy.
I ache: scream to wind.
I care: nothing atm.
I always: stay awake too late.
I am not: real?
I dance: in musical.
I sing: so much that I'll lose my voice.
I cry: when im alone.
I do not always: know how say things right.
I fight: for future.
I write: not so often that I should.
I win: hardly ever.
I lose: my mind. ;)
I confuse: system.
I listen: hard as I can.
I can usually be found: front of my computer.
I need: to go to sleep.
I am happy about: starry sky tonight.
I should: go to SLEEP!
torstai, syyskuu 05, 2002 |
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keskiviikko, syyskuu 04, 2002
Oh sunny day. This happy day. Listening Korpi Ensemble and feeling quite tired, even tho I've drink plenty of coffee. I woke up few hours ago, and I still feel like I've been up for minute or two. So sleepy. Now I go and fresh up myself in shower, then to city to meet Eka, Senni and later at night mum will come here and we'll have nicey time together, chatting, listening my new great jazz records and so on :) Yeah!
I need to tell something about weekend here, but not now. Days goes on so fast...
keskiviikko, syyskuu 04, 2002 |
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